The Pain of Silence...

Why is God often silent? As life hurls its insults and barbs of pain, confusion, and unfairness, we turn to God, ready to hear the answers that will take it all away. Nothing. Complete silence.

I wish I could say I had an answer to my own question. I don't. I'm just like anyone reading this; one who is regularly kicked in the teeth by life. I ask God to take the pain away. I tell God I want things to be different. I even throw fits at God and beg for answers. Sometimes I hear Him. Many times He is sovereignly silent.

I am not a patient man (probably reason for God to stretch me through silence). Like most Americans, I want answers now! And not just any answers. I want answers that are to my liking and in my timing and according to my standards. Is this sounding familiar to any of you? Painfully convicting, isn't it? I believe we often say we are genuinely seeking God for answers to our problems, but sometimes are unwilling to honestly look at the answers He IS providing because they require US to change.

Another thing I am not is flexible. I don't like change, at least not when it involves pain. If things must change I want them to happen in a comfortable fashion, kind of like moving into a new house. I get to pick the wall color and size of the garage. But God often asks me to sit patiently in the middle of the confusion of life and simply says, "Trust Me." I confess I'm not great at doing this. I want to move. I want circumstances to change. I want to be comfortable and happy. And God patiently reminds me, "Trust Me."

I hope one day to say that I am faithfully trusting God. I hope that day arrives sooner than later. And in the meantime, I guess I'll take the moments of silence and see them as opportunities to hasten such a lifestyle of faith.

Working on trusting Him,

jonathan